Before I start, I’m going to acknowledge that this post may be a complete contradiction of what I said in my post yesterday. But hey, we’re human and holding two completely contradictory viewpoints is not uncommon for our species and I’m certainly no exception.
So after posting yesterday, I’ve been wracking my brain trying to think of a circumstance where it might actually be better to keep a secret from your partner, where confessing it might actually be more selfish than keeping it to yourself. And I think I may have come up with one: if you’ve cheated and there’s no other danger of being detected, and you’re sure it won’t be repeated.
So here’s the scenario: in a fit of poor judgment, lust, drunkenness or whatever leads people to be unfaithful, you sleep with someone other than your partner; afterwards, you’re plagued with guilt, search your soul and reach the conclusion that it will not happen again. You’re not just fairly sure it won’t happen again, you’re CERTAIN. In this case, I’m wondering: mightn’t it be better to keep that secret?
The Cheater’s Confession may seem like an incredibly mature gesture, but when the’re’s no risk that you might be found out, isn’t it equally possible that confessing is simply an act of selfishness? It will bring you relief from guilt, but transfer all the negative feelings onto your partner who will now experience hurt, anger, suspicion, disappointment and disillusionment. Anyway, this is just a theory and I’m not fully committed to this viewpoint, so as always, I welcome a differing point of view . . .
And of course, none of my blogs would be complete without the shameless plug at the end: check out Secret on December 24!